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Talking About Money in a Relationship
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Securityplus FCU
Money can be a sensitive topic in a relationship and often goes unspoken. Money issues in marriages are not uncommon and, in fact, among divorcees, 21% say that money was the reason for their split. One of the best ways to keep from being a statistic is to actively participate in healthy conversations about your finances with your partner. Here are some strategies for having the money talk in a relationship, from your friends at Securityplus Federal Credit Union in Maryland.
Timing is everything when it comes to having a successful financial conversation with your partner. If you’re in a new relationship, try to talk about money early on. The earlier you can have this discussion, the better you will be able to determine if you are a good financial fit with your partner. If discussed too late in a relationship, it may come across as an attack on each other’s spending habits and financial goals.
Once you’re in a more committed relationship, it’s wise to check in frequently about financial topics, especially if you are living together or married. Plan a time that’s convenient for both of you in advance so it doesn’t occur only after big financial decisions or situations, which may set you up for money disagreements.
Once you find time to talk, the next step is knowing what to talk about. It’s best to plan what you’ll discuss ahead of time so you’re both able to stay on track with your objectives. Here are some relationship money topics to consider:
Timing is Everything
Timing is everything when it comes to having a successful financial conversation with your partner. If you’re in a new relationship, try to talk about money early on. The earlier you can have this discussion, the better you will be able to determine if you are a good financial fit with your partner. If discussed too late in a relationship, it may come across as an attack on each other’s spending habits and financial goals.Once you’re in a more committed relationship, it’s wise to check in frequently about financial topics, especially if you are living together or married. Plan a time that’s convenient for both of you in advance so it doesn’t occur only after big financial decisions or situations, which may set you up for money disagreements.
Plan What Financial Topics to Discuss
Once you find time to talk, the next step is knowing what to talk about. It’s best to plan what you’ll discuss ahead of time so you’re both able to stay on track with your objectives. Here are some relationship money topics to consider:
- Short-Term and Long-Term Financial Goals: Discussing savings and spending strategies, budgeting for vacations and holidays, as well as family and retirement planning can all be goal-based financial planning topics to talk through over the course of your relationship.
- Bills & Spending: Deciding who’s paying the bills if you’re splitting them or discussing a plan to pay for any large upcoming or recent expenses can help keep each other in-the-know and avoid any unwanted surprises and relationship tension.
- Kids: If you have children with your partner, you may want to discuss allowances, upcoming expenses, college savings, or thoughts around opening youth savings accounts in the child’s name and letting them use a debit or credit card if they are older.
- Family: You may need to talk through how to handle any family issues that may arise, like helping out a family member with a loan, or handling an estate.
- Budgeting: If you’re going through a new life stage or milestone (e.g. buying a house or having a baby), or don’t have a budget at all, creating one together can help you both get on the same page.
- Taxes: Committing to a time and plan for how to handle your deductions and tax returns if you’re filing together, and what you’d like to put your tax refund towards can help make tax time go a bit smoother.
Financial Counseling for Couples
If you’re having financial issues in your marriage or are having arguments about money with your partner, it may be best to bring in a professional. Money issues don’t need to tear your relationship apart, but if it’s starting to steer in that direction it’s best to act fast. There are several types of individuals available to assist you during this time.- Financial counselors are there to offer an unbiased opinion about your finances to reduce any financial issues in marriage. Securityplus Federal Credit Union offers financial counseling through our partners at GreenPath.
- A financial planner or financial advisor can help couples develop a mutually agreed upon plan to help reduce any stress. Our financial advisors work hard to give you expert advice to set you up for a bright financial future.
- Marriage counselors can help you talk about your feelings towards money in a relationship and help you understand each other’s needs and how to better meet them.